maybe we can analyse this better when its being penned down? so let's begin..
the project has been an absolute love-hate affair since day 1. sometimes one outdo the other. but we've kept convincing each other (us and the project, yeah it's pretty much a relationship) that it'll work. we had to believe in it, to make it work. nevertheless, we've been working our rears off! deliverables and deadlines, mounting on each other.
recent monday 8th feb was a complete turnaround. received news to put everything on hold til further notice which would be on tues 6pm!
its like your other half telling you that he/she needs time off and will let you know where the relationship is heading in 24 hrs time.
come tues 6pm, the meeting was called off at the 11th hour leaving everyone in utter shock! sleepless night #2, so we had to wait til wed 9am. oh dear lord.
come wed 9am, we were told that project has been called off. but then by the evening, we were informed that project is still under consideration. speak of being fickle?
thurs, we're told to present as to why the project needs to go on. but hello?? wheres the justification to US that the project is called off in the first place?? but okay, we did so anyway. verdict to know on thurs night.
thurs nite: "theres no light at the end of this tunnel". they said that its deferred indefinitely, on paper. but told us to assume that its off anyway, off the records, refusing to have it in b/w. wtf is that suppose to mean? you then told me that "i feel like i've just been dumped without rhyme or reason". and so i went home broken hearted and slept it off. it was more than the project.. its the possibility of never seeing you again.
friday morning, STILL in crisis mode, first thing in the morning was called to join the crisis team to respond to the higher orders in official writing to convince the completion of at least phase 1 of the project. did so and the team is now presenting the letter.
verdict.. after CNY?
really, its like a relationship at the verge of going off. one party is trying to call it off without the guts to actually call it off and tell it to the other party. while the other is trying life and death to reconcile, and justify why the relationship should go on. till then we have approx good 4-5 days.. time off from each other to think and make (hopefully) sound decision.
now, remind me again why should i not love my job :)
